One of the things that bother us parents the most are those moments when our children start fighting over anything. You are playing with your children and everything seems to be going well, but you go away for a second to make food, take a call or put on a washing machine and start that little music in the background that irritates us so much: 'that's mine, give me my toy, what I hit you ... 'Any trifle becomes an object of fight and discussion between brothers.
When my children fight, I sometimes resort to the old trick of separating them. Each one goes to their room while I repeat the same phrase that they should already know by heart: 'if you don't know how to play together, you play separately'. Needless to say, they are unable to hold on, and five minutes later they get back together because they can't be without each other. This has made me think of ways to make them play together without so much rivalry or fighting and, by extension, so that learn little by little to be good brothers:
1. Teach them to ask for forgiveness. I have verified in my own case, that the one who receives the forgiveness feels comforted and immediately accepts the apology and continues playing with his brother grateful that the mistake was acknowledged.
2. Learn to share. Most sibling fights tend to come because they both want the same toy at the same time or one of them does not want to put down their toys. Teaching sharing is a task that requires patience and time, children have to be prepared to learn this value, they have to understand that it is good and fun and that if they share they can also play with toys that belong to others.
3. Stimulates dialogue and conversation between siblings. Trust between them is essential to lay the foundations of what will be a good future relationship of support and love.
4. Teach the value of empathy. It is one of the fundamental values when educating a child. Teach you to stop and think and put yourself in the shoes of the other, to know if a behavior can hurt a brother, make him feel bad or make him sad is essential to generate a better relationship.
5. Teach respect. They have to learn to to live in family, to accept that the brother may have other ideas, ways of seeing things or way of behaving always within limits and that these can be as good as his.
We cannot prevent siblings from fighting or arguing at some point, after all, they live together and living together produces friction, just like adults, and it is not always good to intervene. There are times when it is convenient to let the discussion flow between the two and they find a way to solve it.
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